Too Far Gone [HELENE]

[LADY GENEVIEVE ROCHECHOUART]

Dear Helene,

I have to say that it has been a while since we have last been in contact. I hope this letter finds you in good health and spirits. It is peculiar how we rarely speak to each other. Perhaps this letter may change that fact for I do enjoy your company even if it is just in your writings.  I wonder how long it has been since we have last met. Now, I am getting a little sentimental but you do provide a presence that is almost like my own sister's. Since I must wait for your letter and news, I will tell you a few of my own.

First of all, mother is already looking for a suitor for me and Élisabeth. It is probably for the best. Élisabeth shall soon be nineteen. Younger girls have already been married.  She wishes for the two of us to be married by the end of the year. Élisabeth may attract many suitors and be married soon enough. I, on the other hand, shall probably not find someone. I truly dislike the thought of getting married to someone that I have not yet met nor fallen for. It is the way of us nobles, is it not? Mother would not listen though. She's very much bent on my marrying a man from a respectable family. I don't think I would mind the thought of marrying someone close to my age as much as a man who is old enough to be my father. What do you think of this, Helene?


Louis-Auguste, my second eldest brother has run away. There are rumors, many of them. Behind closed doors, I have heard my father speaking of a political group. I believe that is what they are. He believes that was where Louis has run off to. He was always headstrong. I never thought that he would just leave home like that. You have probably had enough of these bad news. I will tell you one good news, however. Mother and I have recently attended a party. It was really nothing more than a gathering of aristocrats and the king himself. The king came around to speak with us. He's a young boy and reminds me a little of Constantin in his younger years. It is most likely not proper to speak of him as such since he is after all, the king of our country. The candle has been burning for an awfully long time and I don't think I can stay up any longer. I have been rambling for an awful long time now. I shall now just patiently wait for your letter.

With Love,
Genevieve

[HELENE DE ROCHAMBEAU]

Dearest Genevieve,

How your letter ever found me, I do not know, but you could not comprehend the joy it has given me to hear from you. I can’t give away many details of myself, as I fear this letter could be intercepted, so I shall focus my words on you until I can be sure it’s safe to speak freely. I want you to know that I am safe, well and the happiest I’ve ever been, although it comes with many sacrifices. I pray you are happy and healthy, but I must heed you be always on your guard and attentive to the politics around you, liberty cannot have an easy birth.

To hear you speaking of matrimony reminds me of a world far different to my own. I wish I could give you an answer to your question, but I don’t think there is a right answer to give. I myself could not imagine marrying anyone other than the one I love. Does age matter? You might find yourself a kindred spirit in a man far older than yourself; I wouldn’t fear an age difference, merely a man who doesn’t value the people around him, no matter what their role in life is. Don’t let your mother determine your path; you must take control of your own future, as I myself have.

I know I said I wouldn’t give away any details of my situation, but I cannot continue this letter without putting to sleep your fears for your brother. He is safe. I can promise you that. He is well looked after and doing what he must for our country. Please let my words be of some comfort for you. He wouldn’t want you to worry. I’m sorry I can’t any say much more at this moment to comfort you, but please don’t worry.

I look forward to your reply and hold you in my prayers.
With Love
Helene.

[LADY GENEVIEVE ROCHECHOUART]

Dear Helene,

I pray for your safety everyday, my good friend. How you speak of secrets make me fear that you are in a place where the threat of death is strong. I shan't press you for any details. I wouldn't want to cause some trouble for you. Certainly, trouble finds us, doesn't it? Yet, your assurance of your safety brings me some joy. Politics is truly a trying thing. We have already had one revolution. I hear talk of another one. Shall this one end like the last? With our king and queen beheaded by their own people? I am, by no means, a friend of the king but I do fear for him. He is but a boy, no older than thirteen. I don't believe in the killing of children. It is cruel, perhaps, evil. It probably isn't best to talk of something like that so I shall stop there.

Your words do enough for me, Helene. It may be impossible for me to disobey mother. She is more like the master of the house than my father. She controls us all. Whomever she chooses, I shall be resigned to marry. No, age does not matter much but the thought of it. It would feel odd. I would rather wed someone that I love like you said yourself. I cannot help but envy you. Helene, you're free. At least, that is what I believe. Again, how you must hide your residence worries me. I wonder what freedom is like and how it feels. These are dreams for me, Helene. I may never get to experience it. You fly as free as a bird while I am kept in a cage. The key held by my mother. It is only she that can choose when to set me free and she never will.

You have seen him then? I rejoice at the thought of his safety. I am puzzled by why he must leave our home. He was a lord and now, my mother and father have disowned him. We have also been forbidden to ever mention him. It pains me to think of him thought as a traitor by our own family. I promise to you that I will not worry about him anymore. The best thing to do is to let God guide him and hope that he comes back in one piece.

With love,
Genevieve

[HELENE DE ROCHAMBEAU]

Dearest Genevieve,

As I look around myself now and read your letter, it seems like a long time ago I saw you. Things are so different now and my life is so far from the life I had at the manor with my father. Have you heard from him? If you do please tell him I am safe and that I’m sorry. He’ll know why. Tell my father I couldn’t leave with him and leave Henri behind, I had to do what I did and that I pray he will one day forgive me. Send him my love.

Everything we do is for the people of France, perhaps one day we will be lucky and everyone will have the liberte they deserve. It saddens me to think of people losing their lives, but it is a price we all have to pay for the future of France.
You will find your purpose in life Genevieve, I know the strength that lies in your mother has been passed onto you also. You are one of the smartest women I know, do not doubt yourself. I am grateful to have a friend as kind as you, stay strong and find your voice with your mother. Although I am happy, I’ve learnt that the freedom…the liberte we all desire is likely to never be achieved. I’d be scolded so, for saying it, but I feel I can be honest with you. We will always be in chains, restrained by ourselves or the people around us. I may be free from the clutches of society, but my heart won’t allow me freedom.

You brother is safe and sends his love, I pray you will understand his choices and know I will do what I can to ensure he is safe. I can’t write for much longer, as there are things to do. I look forward to your return letter and will keep you updated as much as I dare.

Love always,
Helene